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Tips and Hints
I constantly get asked for party tips or hints
So, as I try to do, I asked the loyal and knowledgeable BMFC members for their advice when compiling this document and I also added a few of my own observations and here is the result of the research.
Read through this advice and hopefully you will get the most out of your BMFC experiences …
- Do plenty of research - before you even contemplate attending any adult party – what are you hoping to achieve? … what are your limits? …. Which party / venue is best for you?
- If you are a couple, ensure you discuss and agree your boundaries – and decide which are soft boundaries (can be moved if the situation feels right for both parties) or hard (you are not prepared to budge)
- If you are single, know your boundaries – remember, the BMFC have a very strict NO PRESSURE policy. No means no!! BMFC Parties are ultimately SOCIALS, so no-one should attend and “expect” to play!!!
- Plan your journey - Make sure that you are fully aware of the route before you leave your home – do a trial run beforehand if it isn’t too much trouble … Leave home with ample time to allow for any “incidents” en route!! And above all, ensure that you arrive at a party before the doors close at 1am, or you may not get entrance.
- Check your vehicle before your journey – Make sure you have enough petrol etc
- Be prepared - Print off the email that gives you the directions and make sure you bring it along with you
- Make a note - of the party phone number “just in case” …
- Get clean - Make sure that you have taken extra care in ensuring your bits and pieces are clean – this also includes having a wash DURING the evening too (so bring a towel or wet wipes with you)
Invest in a “play bag” – and ensure you have a supply of the following :
- Wet wipes
- Condoms (a variety of size as boots selection may not fit all! have a look online at the Trojan brand. Don’t just bring one condom, and don’t expect other guests to give them to you
- Shower gel
- A mini towel/large flannel (just in case there aren't any towels available at the venue)
- Toothbrush / toothpaste / breath freshener
- Antiseptic hand cleanser
- Pen & paper – to capture the contact details of guests who interest you!
- Be safe - Don’t worry that bringing condoms with you to a party will look like your are being presumptuous … You are being CAREFUL and SAFE - Bring them with you!!
- Bring your own supply of condoms – safe sex is YOUR responsibility, not the other persons!!
- Gents - Think on your toes - bring an “extra bottle” or two, so that you can offer the lady an alcoholic drink during the evening!
- Ensure that you fully understand and agree to abide by the BMFC Etiquette – failure to adhere to our code of engagement will result in you being removed from a party and you will NOT be offered a refund.
- Find the dance-floor and use it! – the music at our parties is always fantastic, so utilise the facilities, shake your ass and show all the guests how you move!!
- Be friendly – chat, flirt, have a giggle
- Introduce yourself – this is a great ice breaker and not only applies to our regulars but it’s always recommended that newbies make an effort too!
- Mingle – be observant – check out the crowed, take a walk around, don’t stand in one place all night expecting the fun to come to you! …. Approach people who look “interesting” and ensure that you have some decent topics of conversation to hand!
- Remember that most people like “personal space” - Ladies, don’t presume that ALL men love to have their undercarriage groped and enjoy being spoken to crudely whilst they're socialising. Some guys are horrified at this and haven't returned to the parties. Sure, many may appreciate this kind of attention, but not all.
- Ensure that you do not use BMFC parties as a training ground for your social skills – chances are, if you can’t pull a bird at a normal club, you wont be successful at one of our parties!!
- Be inventive - “Do you fancy a fuck?” – is not a chat up line that will get you much success.
- Do remember – No means No
- Remember your manners – if you are fortunate enough to play during the evening, remember to say “thanks”
- Do not offend - Not interested in playing? – no need for being rude – a straightforward but FIRM “no” should suffice.
- Do not “make up excuses or give reasons” – if you try to let someone down gently by saying “I don’t feel like playing at the moment …. “ will only invite the other guest to approach you later …. If you don’t want to play, that’s your right and there is no reason to give any excuse. – a straightforward but FIRM “no” should suffice.
- Don’t eat anything too smelly before a party – common sense really!
- Don’t forget your breath fresheners – to mask the smell of smoke, garlic or other “things” that may have been “eaten” during the course of the evening!!!
- Guys - Don’t become a wolf!! – men who hang around in “packs” at the parties are usually the unsuccessful ones!! …. A “pack” of men is off-putting and unattractive and will usually be avoided by couples and single females. The most successful Guys are the ones who mingle around, alone or in pairs.
- Don’t try to arrange “private” meets with the “other half” of any couples – couples that are “on the scene” tend to have much stronger relationship than those couples who are not, so please do not spoil the fun by trying to arrange any additional fun /private meets behind the partners back. Not only will this show your disrespect and lack of etiquette, but it will also result in you ruining your reputation on the scene. Trust me, no-on will want to play with someone (male or female) who wants to break up relationships!!
- Don’t drink too much alcohol – some people “need” an alcoholic drink to relax, but trust me, too many is lethal in this environment.
- Don’t be a wall–flower – standing alone, looking scared isn’t an attractive look! … Obviously some newbies are going to find their first party daunting, but BMFC guests are just “normal” people. Talk to them the way you would if you were in a bar, house party or a club and you will find that you wont be alone for long!!
- Don’t be presumptuous - play at parties is never guaranteed. Guests who think “I’ve paid my money, therefore I expect fun” stand out a mile and guests will tend to avoid them
- Don’t assume - Guys, just because the lady is chatting to you and happy to have a look around the venue with you, it doesn’t always mean that she wants to play with you!
- Don’t forget – No means No
- Don’t become a porn director - guys: telling some guy you're watching to "dig that pussy out" is NOT acceptable!!
- Don’t invade other people’s play!! - Ladies and gents, if someone is playing, don’t presume it's ok to just hop in there and join in. Maintain a respectful distance from the 'action' and if you are wanted you'll be asked.
- Don’t “piggy back” on other guys hard work – some of the guys that attend our parties have mastered the art of conversation and have exceptional interactive successes!! … Do NOT abuse the lovely guys by “piggy backing” on their hard work. If they are happily playing, then be content that you are able to WATCH. Do NOT push your way forward in the hope that you can get some action too. This is LAZY and trust me, guests know the lazy players as they stand out a mile …. Do NOT let me ever hear a voyeur say to a woman that is having sex doggy style "you eat kebab?"... I mean for fuck sake!!
- Ladies - Don’t become a cock tease - Of course we have repeatedly stated that the BMFC operate a no pressure policy, however this does not give you the right to become a “cock tease”. This kind of behaviour will get you removed from a party as it just annoys the guys and that makes them go up to the other women and use lines like "you wanna fuck?" and the spiral of stupidity goes on and on...
- Guys – Don’t thug out! - no one is impressed....if you get angry and frustrated it could be due to a number of reasons (your game stinks, you stink, it's just not your night, you look like you would fuck anything within arms reach, you're an idiot) so take a deep breath, chill the fuck out and regroup
- Don’t raise your voices!! - Voyeurs – Reduce the volume!! - If you are fortunate enough to be watching some people at play, please remember where your volume control switch is. People do not appreciate being disrupted by shouting, giggling or general raucous behaviour. It’s off putting and will probably result in the play ending as the guests will have lost their mojo anyway!!
- Don’t forget, its all about DISCRETION – the BMFC are ADULT parties, arranged by adults for adults. With this in mind, if you are fortunate enough to play during the course of the evening, then our guests do NOT expect you to broadcast their names and recount the action for anyone that wants to hear / read.
- Don’t give out your personal details to anyone and everyone! – you may just live to regret it
- Don’t leave your valuables lying around – your valuables are your responsibility. The BMFC do not take responsibility for anything that is lost during any of our events.
- Don’t forget to spread the word – share your knowledge about the BMFC, pass on the details to your friends that you know would appreciate the community that we have built up.
This document has been developed in the hope that it will help potential BMFC guests. It has been developed in consultation with BMFC members who have also contributed to the advise above
I would like to thanks those members who gave me the wise words – you know who you are!!